• At First.

    by  • August 25, 2010 • Fear, Love - Pure and Simple, To You, Yearning for You • 2 Comments

    At first, I wasn’t attracted to you. I met you when I was dating the man I thought I was going to marry. Things fell apart, but you didn’t know. You don’t really know a lot about me, and I wish you did. I’m the love ’em and leave ’em kinda girl. I don’t like to commit for too long. To think I was going to get married… What a joke.

    At first, it was just for fun. I wasn’t expecting anything to come out of this. You actually annoyed me before we first started dating; you weren’t pushy, but I knew you wanted the relationship. You made it known. But I felt as though you didn’t trust me… Do you believe me now?  Titles have a habit of killing my relationships.

    At first, you shocked me with some of your inexperience. I was the first one you said “I love you” to. You weren’t my first. I hate not having that innocence. I wish you were my first for a lot of things, especially that, because I have never felt the way I do right now. I can’t take back what I’ve done in my past, but as long as you know  this is for real… That’s all that matters.

    At first, I thought I’d be the one leaving you. Here we are, and I feel your on the edge of leaving me for good. I’m scared. I don’t get scared about things like this. I move on fast. This is different. It kills me to have to live in this fear of losing you. Many people say I should walk away, and sometimes I feel like I might. I’m not sure what it is, but I can’t leave.

    At first, I thought I’d get over it. I almost was, but I don’t see that happening to be honest with you. I don’t ask for second chances, but that’s all that I need. I’m in love with you. I would be the happiest girl alive if I were to spend the rest of my life with you. At first, this was nothing. And now… now, it’s becoming everything.

    2 Responses to At First.

    1. Julian S
      August 26, 2010 at 1:27 pm

      That was beautiful.

    2. Gina
      September 25, 2010 at 10:04 pm

      I have a similar story but it was complete young love “Many people say I should walk away, and sometimes I feel like I might. I’m not sure what it is, but I can’t leave.” people never see what this kind of love is where on an outsider it may seem all wrong but you know deep down it is completely right!

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