• Suicide

    by  • August 21, 2010 • Fear, Grief, To Everybody • 2 Comments

    Dear Mom, Dad, siblings, friends, teachers, and everybody else,

    I am so depressed it’s not even funny. I am paranoid, schitzoid, OCD, angry, sad, broken. My home life consists of screaming and passive aggressive behavior. My school days consist of and endless battle with the strive for perfection, and competition with everybody else. My carrer is only my facade of happiness, I am far too good at it. My time spent alone is filled with the thoughts of my inner demons, telling me how weak I truly am. I still cut. The old scars are still there, but new ones reside beside them. And today when I was getting ready to take a bath, I took my razor with me. I layed in the tub, steamy water covering my body, and sliced across my hips,across so many other lines. What if one day I want to cut too deep? What if one day I get tired of crying, tired of the hurt, tired of fake smiles? I fear that day may come.

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    2 Responses to Suicide

    1. krissy
      August 21, 2010 at 6:55 pm

      Please don’t cut. I promise that there are people out there that want to help you… to love you… to be your friend. I know exactly what you’re going through and it’s tough to get out of it. Please just know that life is worth living and striving to survive this battle. My battle is different, but we’re on the same road. I don’t know you, but know that my heart goes out to you. *hugs* I hope you know how beautiful you are and how much stronger you are than you feel.


    2. Erin
      August 21, 2010 at 10:00 pm

      There are people who care, I care. You can be strong, you can do this. I know you’re in a dark place, I’ve been there, but the world is a beautiful place you just have to realize it. You need a vacation, change up your routine and go somewhere beautiful and try something new, you won’t regret it. Stay strong, beautiful <3



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