• I should be so angry.

    by  • August 4, 2010 • Breaking Up, Dating, Love - Pure and Simple, To You • 0 Comments

    It’s the not-knowing that’s making me crazy. I have no idea what’s going on.
    Are we done?
    Are we “on a break” like the kids do? (although, what that would mean, considering neither of us is likely to scamper off and hook up with somebody . . . )

    There are a hundred things I want to ask you, a hundred things I want to tell you, a hundred things I want your opinion on.

    And that’s all outside of the, “How could you hurt me like that? And for what?” one-sided conversation that spins constantly inside my head.

    There were at least three times at the Conference, when I asked, “Is there anything I can do? How can I help?”
    And never once did you say, “Leave me alone, I need space, I need time away from you.”
    So, I don’t understand why you’re mad at me.

    I’m not mad at you.
    God only knows why.

    I’m confused.
    I’m hurt.
    I’m just as impatient as always.

    I’m going out of my mind, because I don’t know what I should be doing.
    Should I be working on getting over you? Should I be collecting things to tell you, so that when we finally fix this, we can talk about everything again? Should I be working on my angry diatribe, so we can finally fight about this?

    It sucks so much that I still love you.
    Please, I just want to talk.

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