Some time has passed since I have seen you, about four years. And I still can not stop thinking about you. I have tried so hard to forget you, to move on. But I can not seem to leave the image of you behind me. It is as if you have clung to parts of me which I have no control over.
I have sat by and watched as you have dabbled among other girls “Falling in love” as you believe. Spending our youth wandering aimlessly among people who will only know half the story. I sit ideally waiting for you to return even when I have no idea who you will be when you get back, or if you ever will come back.
When we are in town together my heart is in a constant state of agitation. I want to run to you and be mad at you for leaving me be for long.I want to hug you and kiss you and lay under the stars like we used to talking about everything life had to offer. But i stay away, because i know that when i see you every emotion i ever felt will flood into me like a dam breaking loose that I have carefully been constructing over the years. I know when I see her I will never understand why her over me.
I wonder when our time has come if life reveals to us when we pss into our next lives who is that person, and I have a strong suspicion it is you. I want so badly to call you up and tell you how much I love you and how i forgive you if only you can come back to me and assure me you will love me back the same as we used to be. But i find myself wondering if you ever did love me as I loved you. Were they false emotions or did you genuinely mean those things you said.
Time does not heal wounds, it just gives us the time that we need to learn to accept the wound that is there and hope to never create a new one.
But I love you. And i hope when my day comes and truths are revealed that all my questions and struggles bring me to you.