• An Open Letter to Hollywood

    by  • June 23, 2010 • Addiction, Positive Vibes, To You • 0 Comments

    Hey Hollywood,

    This is directed at all of Hollywood’s agents, PR reps, paparazzi, starlets, aspiring actors, actresses, executives, etc. This includes the make-up people, the hair people, the stylists and all the parts integral in the making of a “star”.

    I buy your movie tickets, I rent your videos, I buy your magazines, I follow your lives.  I, and others like me, pay your salary so essentially, I (little ol’ me) am your boss.

    As your boss I am finding it necessary to lay down some new guidelines in the business of Hollywood.  I expect you to adhere to these policies, effective immediately.

    • Dysfunction shall no longer be a norm
    • Destructive behavior is not a photo op – Paparazzi shall avoid drama queens, addicts, and people with no valid talent
    • Orange is NOT a skin color – Knock it off
    • Women and Men shall be of average size – Clavicles, ribs and pelvic bones shall remain under a healthy layer of fat
    • Silicone shall be used only in spatulas and kitchen accessories
    • Plastic surgery shall be avoided at all costs unless medically necessary ie. a dog ripped your face off and you need a transplant
    • Fidelity shall be lauded
    • Honor shall be applauded
    • Talent will be measured by quality of said acting, writing, dancing, vocal and/or instrumental ability and not by the quantity of electronic and/or lighting aids
    • Successful Hollywood shall be expected to give back in some manner for the benefit of mankind
    • Journalists, paparazzi, and bloggers shall refrain from calling ANY clavicle/rib/pelvic showing actor or actress “fat”.  Fines will be commensurate with the damage caused to the actor/actresses self-esteem/box office draw
    • As with all “games” the participants are expected to wish their opponent well and congratulate them
    • Name calling is not allowed

    That’s about it for now.  Let’s gather together for a new era of Hollywood and bring this amazing possibility and positivity into the future.

    Your paycheck depends upon it.

    Warm regards,

    Your Boss

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