• What Were You Thinking?

    by  • May 9, 2010 • Betrayal, Grief • 0 Comments

    I feel betrayed and hurt and the worst part is that it is a result of being involved in something I had come to love. I think it is very important for you to know that I do not think you understand even now that what happened was traumatic and torturous. You seem intent on trying to put it behind us without even acknowledging what I really experienced. You say you are sorry, but I do not feel it. I trusted you and the other leaders and you knowingly put me in a position where I would certainly get hurt. Sure I can get over the physical pain, but the emotional pain will take time. We all make mistakes, but it is how we handle them that reveals our character.

    I wish that I could just tell you to your face how amazingly stupid you are how much you suck at your job. I want to tell everyone around you how mad I am at you and not to trust you. I planned my life around that church and you took it all away from me. It was my family and you corrupted that and shattered that. How can I forgive you from that and just move on? How could you even ask me to stay there and be in the same room as you when I constantly felt in danger? I feel so sorry for your amazing, beautiful wife who has to put up with your stupidity and selfishness and immaturity and ugliness.

    I will feel the pain of this for the rest of my life and you can take the credit for that. I hope that it weighs you down and keeps you up at night because it does for me.

    Leave a Reply