You should be ashamed of yourself. Real men don’t perpetrate bullshit and then say they’re doing it for the betterment of their girlfriends or wives. The only good fucking you gave me was the kind no one wants. This relationship was too expensive, in terms of time, money, and mental anguish.
I gave you my twenties, the years I should have been out dancing, drinking, and being the free spirit everyone loves me for being (everyone but you, that is). The only thing I’ve ended up with is your car with a pawn ticket call out on it and a bunch of other meaningless bullshit.
So you call me tonight, and ask me if I’m dating anyone. You ask me not to date anyone until I move back to Minnesota. You say you’re sorry for making me cry. You say you’re sorry for failing me.
You don’t fucking deserve to say these things to me. It’s none of your goddamn business and sorry just describes you as a person. It doesn’t come close to describing the things you’ve done. Ironically, while I’m stuck in this hellhole of a state trying to get my degree and lose the weight I gained being with your peckerhead ass, you’re able to gallivant across the country since you don’t have any real desire to take care of your responsibilities.
I’m the best you’ll never have again. I’m cheerful, straightforward, kinky, witty, and intelligent. I like to fuck, give head, travel, get my adrenaline on, and have a great time living my life in general.
People that know both of us have told me that the way you’ve treated me is a shame; I’m too nice and sweet. They go out of their way to make me smile again. My family and friends think it’s a motherfucking atrocity and are giving me hella support.
A boy I had a mutual crush on in high school still likes me, and I still like him. It’s been twelve-plus years since we spent any substantial time together and he still manages to make me feel special in a way you never, never ever did. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking, leaving this sweet, awesome boy for your stupid ass. At least I found the good sense early on to not birth your children.
I wish whomever you decide to get with next has even more patience than I do, which is entirely impossible.