• Archive for March 22nd, 2010

    Dear English Class Snobs

    by  • March 22, 2010 • Knock it Off, School • 0 Comments

    I know you’re in my major, and we’re going to have to be in the same classes throughout the remainder of our acadmeic career, but you really have to shut the fitch up sometimes. Don’t start conversations with me in class and act all surprise that i haven’t read some of the books you have.

    Read more →

    The BITCH on Drinking

    by  • March 22, 2010 • The Bitch • 2 Comments

    Alcohol… it doesn’t make me like you any more than usual – it just slows my reflexes enough that I forget to tell you to fuck off BEFORE you walk away. Mondays are for DRINKING. Bitch, out. Related Post BITCH Bootcamp: Week One Today I’m a Bitch Bitch Bootcamp: Week EIGHT

    Read more →

    I wish

    by  • March 22, 2010 • To Everybody • 0 Comments

    MY SWEET DREAM IS YOUR NIGHTMARE. HER SOFT LIPS HER SMOOTH SKIN, PERKY NIPPLES AND ROUND BOTTOM AWAKEN MY SENSEs. HER BEAUTIFUL HEART-SHAPED FACE LANDS on my runway. EVERY STROKE OF HER PAINT BRUSH ADDS MORE INTENSITY to the painting . finally the rivers splash in this complete work of art. TO SATISFY mother nature

    Read more →

    Life Goes On

    by  • March 22, 2010 • Lost Love, To You • 0 Comments

    I saw you yesterday, and it was good for me, because even though you do not know me, I know parts of you very well – namely your ex-wife and your daughter. They are both dear to me, as they probably are or once were to you. Many times I have envied you, for your

    Read more →

    Frenemies.

    by  • March 22, 2010 • Friends, To You • 0 Comments

    Dear ‘friends’, In case you weren’t aware, everyone bitches about you when you’re gone. All of you. You may think you’re above reproach, but all of your friends secretly despise you. I understand that you must all secretly despise me as well. I mean, I’ve had plans four times in the last nine months, I

    Read more →

    Who’s the smart one after all?

    by  • March 22, 2010 • To You • 0 Comments

    I hear you’re going to Dartmouth. Just so you know, my college is ranked higher than yours by Forbes. You, your stuck-up attitude, and your overpriced, overrated, ivy-league education can suck it. Related Post Where are you? Wow I’m Already Gone

    Read more →