• Archive for March 18th, 2010

    Thanks For the Memories.

    by  • March 18, 2010 • Friends • 1 Comment

    We were best friends, once. Not that long ago, really. I miss that. I don’t understand why we no longer talk. Why any silence between us is awkward, and the forced small talk is only slightly better. When we go off to college next year, I know we would have drifted apart. This one year

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    Thanks for the crabs.

    by  • March 18, 2010 • The Ex • 0 Comments

    Seriously. That was such a nice gift you gave me. And it truly is “the gift that keeps on giving.” I have been debating which was sweeter. The fact that I was sitting on the toilet, minding my own “business” and I looked down to find 3 little critters on my bikini line – OR

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    What Will Become of Her?

    by  • March 18, 2010 • Children, The Ex • 0 Comments

    For so long I have considered you to be ill, simply sick, but I never really know WHAT is in your mind. You fight with everybody, sisters, dad, coworkers. Everyone is either an ally in your current war or an enemy. What the heck happened to you? You have no friends, because those who know

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    What’s with the Face Lift?

    by  • March 18, 2010 • Knock it Off • 0 Comments

    You look like someone pulled your skin up so taut that you have a skin ponytail on your head. There, I’ve said it. Your lips resemble Rocky Balboa after his losing match. Your eyebrows are preternaturally high. I don’t even KNOW what preternaturally means…but it sounds really bad. You can’t close your eyes all the

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