• what if I never find love?

    by  • February 28, 2010 • Love - Pure and Simple • 4 Comments

    I’m afraid of being alone – of never finding that one special person. My life is so rich in many ways, I have the world’s greatest mother, many supportive friends, and an education that will get me far in life. I am comfortable on my own and I love who I am. I don’t NEED someone else to be whole, but that doesn’t mean I don’t sorely WANT someone. What if I never find that person? OR worse, what if I spend my life with the wrong one?

    I hope to God that I find that person, but I’d rather be alone for life than with someone who doesn’t treat me right.

    I’m in my twenties, so some might say, “stop whining! YOu’re so young.
    You have plenty of time!”…not very helpful.

    I guess I should count my blessings and recognise that love comes in
    many forms. I HAVE found love – in my family and friends….but is it
    selfish of me to want more than that?

    4 Responses to what if I never find love?

    1. mlg73
      March 1, 2010 at 2:58 pm

      i’m in the same position. my parents divorced after 32 years of marriage, and i don’t trust anyone. my biggest fear is ending up with the wrong man and being alone like my mother

    2. Goofy
      March 1, 2010 at 3:51 pm

      You must be open to find love…and realize first and foremost that you are worthy of love. I think many parents married so early in their life, without accepting who they were first. I mean, I believe that we are who we are. Yes, we may change a bit in the course of life…but our basic morals are established. People that get married so early often have it in the back of their mind that they can change certain aspects of their partner…and are then dismayed to find that this doesn’t happen. I remarried as an “older” lady and am so grateful to have him in my life. THIS is what love really is…and I trust him because he is trustworthy. He loves his family, has a good relationship with his mother and follows through on all the things he says he’s going to do. Find the guy with those 3 qualities and he is good stock. It will happen. I promise.

    3. A Bit More Realistic Than Goofy...
      March 1, 2010 at 6:24 pm

      Follows through on everything he says he’s going to do?! REALLY?!?! I like the guy too, but I’m just sayin’ … I’ve heard reports to the contrary from some pretty Goofy people. ;-P

      I agree with Goofy’s encouragement, optimism, and practicality. But as a former romantic who was once in the same place as the original poster, but who has now found happiness, I feel I must share. Relationships are a mix of happy and sad (and 1000 other emotions). There are without a doubt some people who are going to be much better than others (don’t settle!). But I wouldn’t hold out for the type of soul mate you’d think exists from watching The Princess Bride. Oddly enough, it was when I realized that no one is perfect, that I became happy… and the very next day, I found the one who still makes me happy (90% of the time anyway… and I can live with that). In my humble opinion, good advice on true love can be gleamed from chapter eight of ‘The Power of Now’ by Eckhart Tolle (which can be read in part for free on Google).

    4. Realistic's Pissed Off Wife....
      March 1, 2010 at 8:13 pm

      90% of the time?!?!?! 90% OF THE TIME!?!?!

      What the Fuck is THAT?????

      I’m really hoping that my own husband didn’t write the above response, he makes ME happy 100% of the time…and all I get is 90%!

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